Woman

七年正月，太后召趙王友。友以諸呂女為受后，弗愛，愛他姬，諸呂女妒，怒去，讒之於太后，誣以罪過，曰：「呂氏安得王！太后百歲后，吾必擊之」。太后怒，以故召趙王。趙王至，置邸不見，令衛圍守之，弗與食。其群臣或竊饋，輒捕論之，趙王餓，乃歌曰：「諸呂用事兮劉氏危，迫脅王侯兮彊授我妃。我妃既妒兮誣我以惡，讒女亂國兮上曾不寤。我無忠臣兮何故棄國？自決中野兮蒼天舉直！于嗟不可悔兮寧蚤自財。為王而餓死兮誰者憐之！呂氏絕理兮讬天報仇。」丁丑，趙王幽死，以民禮葬之長安民冢次。

己丑，日食，晝晦。太后惡之，心不樂，乃謂左右曰：「此為我也。」

梁王恢之徙王趙，心懷不樂。太后以呂產女為趙王后。王后從官皆諸呂，擅權，微伺趙王，趙王不得自恣。王有所愛姬，王后使人酖殺之。王乃為歌詩四章，令樂人歌之。王悲，六月即自殺。太后聞之，以為王用婦人棄宗廟禮，廢其嗣。

《吕太后本纪》

This story is not about how a woman destroyed a man, but how a women destroyed her family and rebuild a political regime with more cruelty and violence than a man. For a man emperor with rationale, killing sometimes is a strategy. For a woman as the lord, killing is more of a curse with emotional arguments that cannot be justified.

谁

那个谁，我终于想要为你写一首诗

因为我在考试前两分钟合上电脑前托着下巴打了个嗝

电脑屏幕里我没戴眼镜在发呆

就像是在米德厅

等一个大汉堡的表情 而你

也在棱角里漂浮地走来走去  

我看见没戴眼镜在发呆的自己 

就像

在屋顶花园盘腿看直升机 信号灯 

在你靠近又远离后看你

我不知道喜悦是什么 

我只能看你 

漂浮如一架钢琴

我不知道除了看你还能怎么办

在关不上的夜晚 和

打不开的白天 

有一天你柱着拐杖 踩着雪橇

我在阁楼生火 吃辣咖喱 或者

是个菠菜三明治也不一定

你说其实你是个天使

看着你漂浮在头顶

我没有伸出手

你看我的书说委屈

我看你的动画说无趣

我们从没有相识 就像

米德厅大汉堡的两块面皮

你说上帝解决所有问题 

因为你为他弹琴

我看着你

我该怎么说  

我发呆时相信的 只有虚和你

有一天你终于离去

我相信的只剩下了虚

我看着不戴眼镜发呆的自己 像是

乏味的土豆泥

你将和另一个人结婚 在一起

做厌恶的工作 和失控的激情

终于不再弹漂浮的钢琴

有一天你脚踝会痛 

你会想起你告诉我的名字太长  或者更多 

譬如  你的脸

太难记

我还是不知道该怎么办

除了看发呆的自己

 

Palace

趙高說二世曰：「先帝臨制天下久，故群臣不敢為非，進邪說。今陛下富於春秋，初即位，柰何與公卿廷決事？事即有誤，示群臣短也。天子稱朕，固不聞聲。」於是二世常居禁中，與高決諸事。其後公卿希得朝見，盜賊益多，而關中卒發東擊盜者毋已。右丞相去疾、左丞相斯、將軍馮劫進諫曰：「關東群盜并起，秦發兵誅擊，所殺亡甚眾，然猶不止。盜多，皆以戌漕轉作事苦，賦稅大也。請且止阿房宮作者，減省四邊戍轉。」二世曰：「吾聞之韓子曰：『堯舜采椽不刮，凡所為貴有天下者，得肆意極欲，主重茅茨不翦，飯土塯，啜土形，雖監門之養，不觳於此。禹鑿龍門，通大夏，決河亭水，放之海，身自持筑臿，脛毋毛，臣虜之勞不烈於此矣。』明法，下不敢為非，以制御海內矣。夫虞、夏之主，貴為天子，親處窮苦之實，以徇百姓，尚何於法？朕尊萬乘，毋其實，吾欲造千乘之駕，萬乘之屬，充吾號名。且先帝起諸侯，兼天下，天下已定，外攘四夷以安邊竟，作宮室以章得意，而君觀先帝功業有緒。今朕即位二年之閒，群盜并起，君不能禁，又欲罷先帝之所為，是上毋以報先帝，次不為朕盡忠力，何以在位？」下去疾、斯、劫吏，案責他罪。去疾、劫曰：「將相不辱。」自殺。斯卒囚，就五刑。(秦始皇本纪)

I have been playing statistics with Stata and SAS for two weeks. And for now I really want to try interpreting this story into programming commands. 

* Step 1: this step shows how an eunuch seize the throne from the silly king peacefully. All variables include: eunuch, king, secretaries, palace, rebels ///

  replace king = eunuch
  list secretaries, detail 
  drop if != var eunuch
  clear
  generate new = palace
  drop_all if != palace
  regress king secretaries if rebels != 0
  drop palace if secretaries=0 & rebels>0
  corr eunuch king rebels, cov
  Capture
  Clear
  
  Execute quietly 
  End of do_file /// 
  
  I am really a genius.
  
  
  
  

  
  

Penalty

《周本纪》

诸侯有不睦者，甫侯言于王，作修刑辟。王曰：“吁，来！有国有土，告汝祥刑。在今尔安百姓，何则非其人，何敬非其刑，何居非其宜与？两造俱备，师听五辞。五辞简信，正于五刑。五刑不简，正于五罚。五罚不服，正于五过。五过之疵，官狱内狱，阅实其罪，惟均其过。五刑之疑有赦，五罚之疑有赦，其审克之。简信有众，惟讯有稽。无简不疑，共严天威。黥辟疑赦，其罚百率，阅实其罪。鼻辟疑赦，其罚倍厉，阅实其罪。墨罚之属千，鼻罚之属千，髌罚之属五百，宫罚之属三百，大辟之罚其属二百：五刑之属三千。”命曰甫刑。

《吕刑》郑玄疏曰：死刑是罪之大者，故谓死刑为大辟。

This short document records the origin of criminal justice system in ancient Chinese kingdom Zhou, or the Zhou Clan. Most violations of laws at that moment can be generalized into two categories, one is doing bad things to other people, the other is staying in the place which does not suit you. The place could be some spot, also can be a collection of things, positions that you should not have done. They are simple, easy, and clear definitions, though a bit too simple. 

 The whole system is consist of four successive levels of penalty. Ci, Xing, Fa, Guo. In accordance with the criminal's specific case, different types of punishment including tattooing your guilt on the cheek, nose cut, patella cut, penis cut, and death will be applied. 

Something notable: Among all the guilt leading a person to the sentence of death, one was treating parents badly. 

War

穆王將征犬戎，祭公謀父諫曰：「不可。先王燿德不觀兵。夫兵戢而時動，動則威，觀則玩，玩則無震。是故周文公之頌曰：『載戢干戈，載櫜弓矢，我求懿德，肆于時夏，允王保之。』先王之於民也，茂正其德而厚其性，阜其財求而利其器用，明利害之鄉，以文修之，使之務利而辟害，懷德而畏威，故能保世以滋大。昔我先王世后稷以服事虞、夏。及夏之衰也，棄稷不務，我先王不窋用失其官，而自竄於戎狄之閒。不敢怠業，時序其德，遵修其緒，修其訓典，朝夕恪勤，守以敦篤，奉以忠信。奕世載德，不忝前人。至于文王、武王，昭前之光明而加之以慈和，事神保民，無不欣喜。商王帝辛大惡于民，庶民不忍，訢載武王，以致戎于商牧。是故先王非務武也，勸恤民隱而除其害也。夫先王之制，邦內甸服，邦外侯服，侯衛賓服，夷蠻要服，戎翟荒服。甸服者祭，侯服者祀，賓服者享，要服者貢，荒服者王。日祭，月祀，時享，歲貢，終王。先王之順祀也，有不祭則修意，有不祀則修言，有不享則修文，有不貢則修名，有不王則修德，序成而有不至則修刑。於是有刑不祭，伐不祀，征不享，讓不貢，告不王。於是有刑罰之辟，有攻伐之兵，有征討之備，有威讓之命，有文告之辭。布令陳辭而有不至，則增修於德，無勤民於遠。是以近無不聽，遠無不服。今自大畢、伯士之終也，犬戎氏以其職來王，天子曰『予必以不享征之，且觀之兵』，無乃廢先王之訓，而王幾頓乎？吾聞犬戎樹敦，率舊德而守終純固，其有以御我矣。」王遂征之，得四白狼四白鹿以歸。自是荒服者不至。 (周本纪)

It's not uncommon to see noble houses take over the throne in succession. House Chow, after generations of peaceful regime, began to decline when the heir Mu Chow became the new lord of the kingdom. To shield the kingdom from being divided or invaded by nomadic races, Lord Mu made the decision to start a war with the threatening race of Quanrong. Ji, the hand of the king disagreed with the tentative war, saying that -- "Our kings always advocated virtues instead of wars. Warriors are enlisted to fight in the right time for the rightful war. They are not there for games. My lord, your ancestor Dan pursued to develop virtues of civilians, raise them money for righteous use, cultivate people with education, lead them to avoid evil, and long live the kingdom! We cannot forget how we got here. All these institutions have proved their capacity. Do not break the cord with those houses in exile. And do not forget our ancestors' legacy." Lord Mu neglected his pledge and started the war. He won the game and brought four white wolves and four white deer back to the throne as his triumph. Never again did those nomadic races come to worship Chow. And all those regulations claiming the legitimacy of Kingdom Chow over the nomadic races lost their effects. 

That's not a compliment for the war.  Nevertheless, it seems also impossible to stop a young and ambitious lord provoking a fight just by historical conventions or spirits. 

sorrow

周本纪：
古公有长子曰太伯，次曰虞仲。太姜生少子季历，季历娶太任，皆贤妇人，生昌，有圣瑞。公曰：“我世当有舆者，其在昌乎？”长子太伯，虞仲知古公欲立季历以传昌，乃二人亡如荆蛮，文身断发，以让季历。

It's a story in ancient Chinese history. The emperor has three sons among whom the youngest son had the smartest kid Chang. One day the emperor asked, "who do u think should take over my regime? Should he be Chang?" The two elder sons understand that their father tends to hand over his power to their younger brother so that his brilliant grandson could surely be the next king after his father. Therefore, these two elder brothers leave the palace for uncivilized place, make themselves tattoo like guilty people, cut their hair which presents their connection with their parents, to secure the throne for their younger brother, and their smart nephew.

Why is it so sad.

Things

1st stop: Chinatown @ Boston

Someone said there was no decent food in Boston's Chinatown. I haven't been to a second Chinatown. But this one satisfies me with Chinese-style cakes and the familiar language. It is true that there is no elegant dining place there but, the real ordinary Chinese do not eat elegant food everyday. I love those snacks though they look shabby, and not that delicious.

But it is truly dirty there. Or I should say it is dirty in every Chinatown. I walked around for over one hour without finding a clean toilet. In the end I found a WC in a Chinese supermarket with a strong smell. 

2nd: MFA@Boston
It's great to see so many dead and alive human beings around... If I die there, it must be of the air conditioner. I just cannot understand why we have to prepare at least one jacket to survive the whole tour. I hate artificial coldness.

3rd: Harvard Square
I was happy cuz I bought extra small sneakers. Over. I am always drenched in melancholy that I don't think I belong to that lively atmosphere. 

4th: N.Y.
The bus arrived earlier than the expected time. Ahh... It's weird that you never feel lonely in a strange mega city while you are desperate in a quiet county. I am feeling familiar and comfortable in that chaotic metropolis. Everywhere there are Asian faces. And even when I returned to my house in Waltham, in which I had been staying for two weeks, I had no feeling of belonging to here. It is sad. 

N.Y. is a place where I want to try all the unhealthy foods like ice creams and desserts. It's  so cozy when I heard the ice cream seller approaching our flat singing cozy songs. Maybe people are just terrified by loneliness and solitude in counties. And they choose to stay in the city and live like alien creatures. That is art.